Christmas Day 2010 :)

Readers,

I had a great and warm Christmas this year :). Starting with a special moment I had in Sis. Teresa's home followed by Tzu Chi - Year End Blessings in Kreta Ayer Theatre, and then today's Dhamma Talk in temple plus a little time that I spent with the speaker. All of those activities are meaningful and precious for me. I wish my resolutions for year of 2011 is going to make me to be a better and wiser person :)

To begin with, I and some friends spent our Christmas Day by visiting Sis. Teresa Hsu at her home. It was a warm moment :)

Despite of her age that is reaching 114 years old next year, she is still a great woman! Intelligent! Lots of love and compassion! I still remember her words, "I know the feeling of being hungry. Therefore I don't want to see others in hungry. I begged money so that others who were hungry could eat."

Those words made me to reflect of things that I have done to others, and in fact inspiring me to be a better person than I was before. Those words have made her to stand out for people who are helpless. Her compassion and effort do not stop although she is on the age of more than 100 years old! What a great woman she is! :)

Sis. Teresa Hsu :)

COMPASSION - THERE IS NO 'YOU' NOR 'I'. THERE IS ONLY 'WE'

On the evening, with different friends we went to the Year End Blessing. I was touched by Tzu Chi's actions, throughout year 2010, to help helpless people as well as the world. They do their best without differentiating race, religion, age, etc. They do all of good deeds for making this world as pure as the Pureland, teaching people to do good deeds - avoid evils - and purify our mind/ intention. They inspire me to help others  and universe abundantly and thankful with whatever things I have. (P.S. I am going to join the recycling point every 2nd Sunday of each month, does anyone want to join me as well? You're welcome to do so ;p)

A handmade New Year's card from Tzu Chi :)

Can someone help me to read this? hohoho!! Thank you! ;)

Master Cheng Yen gave the cards to members and they glued the dried paddy on the card :)

For me, it was a coincident that the Dhamma talk this morning was about making resolutions for the new year which is about to come. Making a resolution, not only as per se looking at the physically aims, but also spiritually/ emotional aims. By looking at all impermanence of things (disaster, nature of body - old age, sick, and death, feeling, thinking), we should remind ourselves not to cling to an object. Letting go is the keyword. 

So, readers, have you ready with you resolutions?

World Buddhist Conference (25 - 26 Sept 2010) - 1

A friend's request has inspired me to share what I get from World Buddhist Conference 2010.

Living in Harmony when Things Fall Apart

Yeah, "Living harmony when things fall apart" was the theme for the World Buddhist Conference 2010. Ven. Thich Nhath Hanh was the keynote speaker during the conference. However, due to his health condition, he only appeared on first day of the conference. Yet few hours of his appearance had made a great opening and gave food for thought for me and maybe the other audience as well.

He taught us about orange tree in which our speech, action, and thought are the condition that can determine the orange fruit. If there is enough sunlight, water, fertilizer.. the orange tree will grow well and have a lot of great oranges. The same goes for us, our karma fruit depends on our speech, action, and thought. If you do more goodness, mindful with your speech, action, and thought .. the nice karma fruit will be enjoyed. However, if you do more evil things with your speech, action, and thought.. the bad/ not nice karma fruit will be the result of it.

One of his story that I love and keep in my heart is about our hands "left and right hand". Have you ever thought why we have left and right hand? They are there, indeed, for helping each other. Imagine when you have nail and hammer, both hands are working together to help you to hold the nail and hammer at the same time. Then ask yourself, why do we can't be like our hands? Helping each other instead of jealous and quarrel with others. Amazing isn't it? We can learn something from our body! It's a great insight for me hehe ;)

Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh also told us that a Sangha life is possible everywhere, when you plant and grow the seed of brotherhood and sisterhood inside the community. For this, my opinion is try it! :). Since we can't change others, why don't we change ourselves first by planting and growing the seed of brother- and sisterhood to our family members, friends, neighbours, and colleagues?

Nothing

Readers,

I have just read a good novel "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini (Thanks to Venny for giving me this novel! ). But I have not read it until the last chapter..

The very first 5 chapters have described the 'game' of discrimination happened (happens?) in Afghanistan. I stopped my reading because I was so curious with what they call as Hazara people, so I opened my notebook and google it.

To my surprise! They are handsome and beautiful people!! Why then, they were (are?) seen lower than others??

In fact, discrimination is always a hot issue in this world. In my home country, I had experienced the feeling of being discriminated and somehow, I was taught to discriminate those who were discriminated me (Hahahaha!! Double discrimination, isn't it?). 

I think, all of these discrimination things can happen because people within one ethnic see themselves superior as compared to people from different ethnic. People see themselves as superior beings mainly because they are in the first rank in term of population number in an area. Secondly, they think that they are in high caste (smarter, more beautiful, etc) than others. Discrimination occurs not only within human beings.. Have you ever thought that some human beings also differentiate their rank with animals? Thus, those people abuse animals as if those animals are useless beings.

Based on my observation (correct me if I am wrong), discrimination takes its very place due to self-centered mind. We believe that there is 'I' within ourselves, and because of the I, we kill others to be the winner. Isn't it a sad thing to sacrifice others just to make this body stands up? Remember that this body is only a mixture of soil, water, heat, and gasses. It is nothing, really nothing.

This universe, in fact, is interdependent. We are interdependent, not a separate special beings who need to be said as higher than others. 

Hey, friends..

Why do not we:

working together instead of creating war?

playing together instead of teasing each other?

praising the good of others instead of jealous and hating them?

sharing things with others instead of keeping them just for this rotten body?

Interdependent, indeed, is the nature of everything.

See the "I", watch the "I", and let go of the "I"

May you be well and happy always :)

Meditation

Readers,

Today I have made a commitment, to practice meditation regularly again hehehe. I remember last time I used to practice meditation every morning, but after having so many free time these days, I started to forget the essence of meditating.

Honestly to start again is not an easy task.. I meditated for few minutes, and almost went to the dreamland haha! Well, I guess I need to build the momentum again :)

Although I need to start from the beginning again, I do not blame my slacken time. Without it, perhaps, I would not seek deeper the meaning of doing meditation. Nothing to be regretted, because everything happens for reasons :)

You may click this link Guided Meditation if you want to start doing meditation as well. Meditation offers a lot of benefits, and worth to be tried :)

A little note: 

For me, meditation creates my life happier and I can see things outside the box. I am aware and do my best not to follow the "monkey" mind. How about you?

Life is impermanent

Readers,

Thinking back for a moment, my life is such a wonderful life! I can meet the Dhamma and even, sometimes, I am able to understand the Dhamma itself from my own life experiences. I also meet a lot of great people on the way to reach my goal. They remind me again and again that I am such a lucky person whenever I forgot because I indulged too much with the sense of worldly pleasure.

Today, for example, I went to temple, listened to a great Dhamma talk about meditation, and discussed the meaning of Dhamma with Indonesian Buddhist fellows. 

I remember the speaker for the Dhamma talk mentioned about moving mountain. Can you believe that a mountain is capable to move? We always think that mountain and maybe some things in this world are not moving, they are static.. But are they?

Look at ourselves, some of us may think that life is static. We never realize that mountain of sickness, old age, and death are moving toward us. They can reach us with no time! But for some of us, it is so much more important to think bad about this self, worry the past or future, blame others, grasp things that are pleasant or even not pleasant ones..

Without any notice, my friend's mom just passed away today..(May she be well and happy always life after life!)

Realizing that life is impermanent, let us strive to seek the Truth.. See things as they really are ~~~

Wisdom :)

Readers,

Last Saturday I went to the biggest library in Singapore (nearest MRT: Bugis MRT). Early on that day, I had no plan at all to visit the library, the plan was only to pray in temple, have lunch, and go home. However, after I crossed the street in front of the library, thinking of walking to a bus stop and finding a bus to go home.. suddenly there was a whisper in my mind "Hhmm library!! I have not been there for such a time. And because it is rain, maybe it is a good idea for me to visit this library."

And the thought guided my steps to enter the library.

In library, I found an interesting book "The Power of Chi". When I saw the title, it reminded me the words of Ven. Thubten Chodron. Her words are about the reason of why we need to put our hands on lap, near stomach, during meditation session. It is to circulate our Chi. So, there I was.. adding the book to my reading list of the day.

Reading the book has made me to discover the relationship of Chi and human internal organs: 

1. Liver. When we have freedom to move around, our liver is in a good condition.. while when we are stuck or bound up, it can affect our liver to be in a bad condition.
2. Heart. Positive Chi such as joy and creativity affects the heart positively, while negative chi such as hysteria or joy taken the extreme affects the heart negatively.
3. Spleen/ Stomach. Empathy and sense of groundedness have positive effect to the stomach, while obsessive worry has negative effect.
4. Lung. When we have courage, it affects our lung positively.. while when we are grief, it affects negatively.
5. Kidney/ Adrenal. A will or determination affects kidney/ adrenal positively, while fear and anxiety affect them negatively.

Chi is determined by our environment, food, and the way we think. Pollutants, stress, trauma, and negative thinking reduce our Chi. Hence, low Chi causes depression, anger, and fear.
The book also teaches us methods to increase our Chi, such as:

• Imagining that you are sending root down to the earth, bringing up good, green, and healing energy to your body
• Visiting nature! Don't forget that we are a part of nature :)
• Meditation. Breathing in "I am strong as a mountain".. Breathing out "I am rooted to the earth"

Besides that book, I read other books and found several wisdom words.

• You are not what your thoughts or feeling. You are only a beautifully endowed observer of thoughts and feeling.
• It is a miracle that we don't melt in bath. It is astounding that we get a billion second chances
• Be happy is one way of being wise
• When we are born, we are soft and weak. Thus, flexible and yielding are followers of life.When we die, our bodies are hard and stiff. Thus, stiff and unbending are death
• Emotion is only energy states which you travel through on your life's journey. It is not you!

May you be well and happy always :)

The Answer

Readers,

Today I went to Wat Ananda Metyarama Temple at 50 Jalan Bukit Merah,Singapore for joining Sunday Puja and listening to the Dhamma Talk.

For me, the Dhamma Talk was indeed very deep and great. It helped me to find answers for some of my questions. It reminded me the words of the Buddha.

Thought, feeling, and everything are impermanent. 

Why do you cling to it when you know they are going to vanish in a time?

Notice the rise and fall, it is only thought.. it is only feeling ..

It is not you!

No me, no feeling, no thinking .. ~~ Emptiness ~~

Yeah, that's right.. Before the moment I am being reminded, sometimes when I think too much, I will only make myself believe that I am that imagination being. I close all the open doors which are in front of me, close all opportunities to see and realize the Dhamma in my everyday life. Although the Dhamma is also empty, I understand that at this present moment the Dhamma is important because it helps me to be mindful in every thought, action, and feeling.

Just as the water flow,

I will let my mind to flow as well.

Yet I will observe it, by not falling and drowning into it.

Mindfulness is the key.

Aaahhh may all beings be well and happy always!!! :)

Nafsu kah ini?

Readers,

Hari ini saya melihat bahwa saya memiliki pikiran yang dikuasai nafsu. Karena menemukan suatu berlian, saya merasa saya tidak butuh untuk membagi nya dengan orang lain. 

Dalam pikiran saya ada tertulis, "Ini berlian saya yang menemukan, kenapa mereka-mereka tidak mau berusaha mencari berlian seperti saya? Tapi selalu saja bergantung pada saya untuk menemukan satu dan nanti nya mereka akan mengorek di lubang sama yang saya gali, untuk menemukan berlian lainnya."

Kenapa ya readers ada muncul pemikiran seperti itu? Apakah itu hal yang biasa bagi manusia lainnya? Bukankah kalau kita berbagi, itu adalah suatu hal yang membahagiakan? 

Namun, saya sadar, dalam hal ini bukannya saya tidak ingin berbagi, tetapi saya ingin mereka juga berusaha sebelum langsung meminta mentahan pada saya. Hmm pengalaman ini juga pernah saya alami sewaktu saya di university .. 

Path to a G-day

Hello again Readers :)

I am writing this blog while taking a break from packing my stuffs to be brought to Malaysia. Yihaaaa, tomorrow morning at 10.45 a.m. I am going to fly to KL by bus heeeee!!! Personally, going back to KL is a moment that I always look for because of

F.A.M.I.L.Y  ,  F.R.I.E.N.D.S ,  M.E.M.O.R.I.E.S  ,  F.O.O.D  ,  and  C.L.O.T.H.es

This time KL or exactly Sunway will be the witness of my graduation ceremony :). If I may tell you a little secret of mine... Several days behind, I had no excitement about the graduation ceremony which is going to be held on Saturday, 13th November 2010. Not at all. Not until the time I had conversation with my best friend who is in Malaysia. All of sudden, the excitement about receiving the scroll is up in my heart. 

The dress is ready. 

The photo package is going to be booked.

My parents are on their way to reach KL (due to Merapi, they need to go to other city for flying)

My siblings and friends are preparing themselves.

And ...

 I am going to be officially a graduated student!! :)

Thank you for my parents who have spent their nights and days thinking and giving me all my necessities.  Thank you for all my teachers who have taught me a lot of knowledge and wisdom. Thank you for all my friends who support, give me comfort and the taste of city. Thank you for everyone who have helped me to be who I am today :) :) :)

To be an Indonesian..

Hi Readers!! :)

When you started to find me writing a lot in blog, it is a sign that I have MORE free time heeee!! ^^

I am writing this post with a cup of hot milo beside my left hand. Aaaahhh.. What a wonderful moment I have right now! :)

Basically, this moment I have no idea what I should pour on this blank page. Inside my head, there is a confusion about a thing, whether I should take the opportunity and then go to the other part of the world or just say thank you and ignore it. Also, despite of my phobia to return and stay in Indonesia due to some traumatic events few years ago, I am happy for Indonesia, my home country.. I found a blog written by 'bule' who is working and staying in Jakarta, Indonesia. He is happy to be there. He said safety in Jakarta is almost the same as in Singapore. He admires the friendliness of people over there. He even gives some beautiful facts and advices for foreigners who are going to work in Indonesia. It is a WOW!! for me. It tickled me to write and ask to that 'bule' as I am a foreigner to my home country, but I won't do it hehe! ;p

Honestly, before I found that blog and read those nice comments of Indonesia from foreigners, I never thought that Indonesia is a good place to stay (Don't trust me if you haven't visit Indonesia!). Well, perhaps it is because of my phobia that the same things will happen again in the future haha! 

After all, I need to say to myself that I am happy to be an Indonesian :) :) :). It is not important to think about how the country and people treat you, because we might find bad treatment in other countries as well. It is more about contentment, to be happy to be who you are right now. I can't change the past, and erase my bad memories straight away, but there is always a way for me to change my view and attitudes towards my native people and country.

And here you go.. as my hot milo had just finished, this post would be ended here.

The Mind

Hello readers!! :)

I am in my new room @ Clementi, Singapore right now :). Surprisingly, "Tea and Coffee" post was a controversial post because it seems that some people thought I was angry with him/ her. Perhaps some people have this thought as well, "Wahh.. Finally this girl could burst out her anger" huahahaha!! 

Whatever your thought was, let it be ... 

Anyway, this time I would like to remind myself about this statement:

"Mind is the forerunner of (all evil) states. Mind is chief; mind-made are they. If one speaks or acts with wicked mind, suffering follows one, even as the wheel follows the hoof of the draught-ox.

Mind is the forerunner of (all good) states. Mind is chief; mind-made are they. If one speaks or acts with pure mind, AFFECTION follows one, even as one's shadow that never leaves. "
— Buddha (Dhammapada) 

Plus let us pray for victims of Merapi and Mentawai or whatever natural disasters that are happening in this world.

May they be strong.

May all beings be free from suffering.

May this disaster end soon.

Last but not least, Do wonderful things as much as you can for them, such as donating money, materials, effort, time, and energy. One wonderful thing can make those who suffer to be strong and smile :)

Our supports are their hope to continue live

May all sentient beings be well and happy always :) :) :)

Coffee & Tea

Hello readers :)

It is not a picture taken by me wekekeke!

I am in The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, Toa Payoh right now :), enjoying my ice blended green tea plus applying job while waiting for appointment at 7 p.m.

Now it sounds like I am a young executive whose life are full of appointments! xDD

Anyway, Readers, I would like to share with you about my BIG self-centered mind. I am not angry with it, I accept it as it is because I am still a usual human being with many positivity and negativity inside. Hopefully by this experience I can eradicate my envy, jealousy, wrong view and learn from it :)

Yesterday I found out that my friends whom I trusted and thought that they would share everything with me.. are indeed not. They had done their own ways and (if my memory is correct) never told me about it. It is like I have lost my sense of trust to them after I know that fact.

The biggest regret I have in my mind is to my parents. They always told me not to be too open to those friends, yet I did not believe them and even gave them a long lecture about being honest to friends haha! (and because of this, my parents were sad; their eldest daughter thought that herself were cleverer than their parents who have gone through many life experiences??). Right now, I know that everything cannot be shared to those friends because they don't share with ME as well, they don't care about ME, they bla bla ME bla bla, bla bla bla ME bla bla...

Readers, can you see the self-centered mind?

Hahaha! Yes, it is always about I, ME, and MY!! Although some guilt are still in the heart, yet I am grateful to take the lesson (FYI, guilt is bad to be cultivated, it is a self-centered mind too; thinking of only I am wrong! I do the mistake! I am bad!). Nevertheless, I am trying to watch the guilt, see it, and let it go... :) :) :)

And for reminder to myself, I would like to post it out:

"After all, this is NOT a competition about who will be the winner or loser! This is just a path of life about how to do your best and effort in order to achieve something successfully."

Okay Readers, time moves fast.. It is time to go.. See yaaa

"Skies of Merit" Retreat (Day 2)

Hello everyone :)

I am sorry, yesterday I could not update you with the "Skies of Merit" Retreat (Day 2). After the retreat, I went to my cousin's place to meet with her father and other cousin. My cousins and I went to Clarke Quay and enjoyed the night there by sharing and taking photos. What a wonderful night we had! :)

Okay.. so the retreat on day 2 was as great as the day 1. The remarkable moment, for me, was when I and some people took the refuge in the Three Jewels (Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha) and precepts. Ven. Thubten Chodron said that by doing such activity, you have made your deep commitment as a Buddhist. Actually this kind of ceremony is only an official thing, what important is when you can plant it at the bottom of your heart and promise yourself to do your best to keep the refuge and precepts until the end of this life.

I am very glad as well, when Ven. Thubten Chodron gave me the name of "Thubten Tsepal" :). Later on, I asked her the meaning of Tsepal and she described it as Noble Life. Hopefully, with my new name, I can change myself to be a better person and live a noble life according to the Buddha's teachings - Do good, avoid evils.

Apart from that, I learn from Ven. Thubten Chodron to REJOICE after we do something good, and also REJOICE for virtuous actions done by others. Rejoicing can be done as well when we remember all of the good qualities of Buddhas and Boddhisatvas. By rejoicing, we are trying to reduce our ill-will, envy, and jealous mind thus experiencing Mudita.

May you be well and happy always :)

"Skies of Merit" Retreat (Day 1)

Hello readers! :).. Nice to be able to meet you again :)

Ven. Thubten Chodron

Today I attended the "Skies of Merit" retreat (part 1) that was guided by Ven. Thubtren Chodron. To my surprise.. until the last 5 minutes, I was mistaken Ven. Thubtren Chodron with Pema Chodron haha! I thought Ven. Thubtren Chodron was Pema Chodron, and before I knew the reality, I was so glad that I was able to meet the teacher whom wrote one of Buddhism great book hahaha. 

Nevertheless, I am not disappointed and have no regret at all to be able to meet, listen, and join the retreat under Ven. Thubtren Chodron. I have found so many sparkling lights come to my mind  because of her words :). And I learn a new approach - the Tibetan way. It is great when you learn how each different ways are actually leading to the same destination.

What did I learn today? 

1. The prostration in Tibetan way    In this way, we put our palm together and bend both thumbs inside. This is called anjali. The space in between the palm indicates EMPTINESS. Right hand indicates COMPASSION, and left hand indicates WISDOM. So, it means that compassion and wisdom should come together; not separating them in our action.
    Prostration is divided into two; short and long prostration. For the short one, firstly, we need to put our hands in anjali, to our crown (the top of our head), forehead, throat, and heart. Then put our hands on the floor (let go the anjali), bend our knees, and lowered our head. We repeat this kind of action three times and closed by doing anjali to our crown, forehead, throat, and heart. For the long prostration, we do exactly the same as the short one, but here, despite of lowering down our head, we lay our body on the floor, straighten our hands aside our head, and bend our palm 90 degrees upward.
Anyway, do you know what is the meaning behind all of these?? Yeaps, you are correct, it is to reduce our pride, ego, and self-centered mind.

When we put our anjali hands to crown, it reminds us of the Buddha who has reached enlightenment, thus motivate us to be a Buddha. When we put our anjali hands to forehead, we invites WHITE LIGHT from the Boddhisatvas to come and purify our bodily actions, i.e. protecting lives of other beings, doing generosity, and developing true love. When we put our anjali hands to throat, we invites RED LIGHT from the Boddhisatvas to come and purify our speech, i.e. being honest, framing our words differently to avoid harsh speech, speaking to create harmony, and be mindful with your speech (sometimes we need to just be QUIET instead of talking). When we put our anjali hands to heart, we invites DEEP BLUE LIGHT from the Boddhisatvas to come and purify our mind, i.e. being contented, rejoicing, developing kind thoughts to every beings (to our enemies too), and setting up the right views. It is advisable to meditate each morning and set out your mind to do goodness for today, and do reflection before you go to sleep at night.

2. Offering
    In fact, offering can be done actually and mentally. So, it does not matter whether you are rich or poor, you still can do offering to the Triple Gems (Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha). Actual offerings are more to material things (money), protecting other beings, loving other beings, and giving the Dhamma to yourself and others. Mentally offering is more to visualizing beautiful things. For example, when you offer a flower, instead of just thinking of ONE flower, you may visualize a garden of beautiful flowers, and then you offer them to the Triple Gems.
    Ohh yaa.. and I think Ven. Thubten Chodron mentioned a good way about offering something/ someone that we are attached to the Triple Gems. It is much better for them to be taken care by the Buddha (Triple Gems) rather than taken care by only ME, isn't it? :)

P.S. Thank you for so many wonderful people that allow me to do this precious deed in this present life :). It is said that the gift of Dhamma excels all gifts.

May all beings be well and happy always!!!

The Plaza

Hello readers! How are you doing? :)

Kali ini saya ingin menceritakan pengalaman saya tersesat hehe! Karena saya musti menemukan "The Plaza-Beach Road" untuk naek bus balik kampong ke KL hari Jumat ini, kemaren saya melakukan research dimanakah The Plaza itu?

Pencarian dari internet mengatakan MRT station terdekat adalah Bugis MRT station, jadi pencarian dimulai dari tempat ini. Saya berputar ke arah yang bertuliskan Beach Road, tapi ternyata bukan Beach Road yang saya temukan, Road dengan nama lain malahan yang saya temukan. Namun, saya tidak menyerah.. Saya benar-benar berputar mengelilingi bangunan Bugis Junction dan bertanya pada seorang cleaner yang saat itu sedang berdiri (ternyata dia tidak bisa berbahasa Inggris! Jadi saya tidak mendapat jawaban darinya). Saya berjalan lurus dan akan menyeberang jalan, ketika seorang Western man bertanya pada saya "Do you know where is Beach Rd?". Seketika itu juga saya tertawa dan berkata, "I am looking for that Road too. But I think maybe this way (sambil menunjuk arah road yang sudah saya lewati tapi masih belom di explore sampai belakang)".

Akhirnya dia berjalan sesuai arahan saya, dan saya pun berjalan ke arah lainnya untuk menemukan Beach Rd. Setelah beberapa saat berputar, ternyata saya bertemu lagi dengan Western man itu, tapi kali ini saya tidak berjalan menghampiri dia karena saya pikir no point kembali ke tempat yang ternyata si Western man pun tidak menemukan Beach Rd.. Saya berjalan ke arah lainnya dan bertanya pada orang yang akan menyeberang. Karena dia menunjuk ke arah depan, saya pun berjalan lurus.. Tapi yang saya temukan adalah Arab Street! Wahh anda semua pasti tidak menyangka bagaimana saya memasuki beberapa toko dan bertanya pada mereka. Well.. beberapa orang dari yang saya tanyakan pun juga tidak pasti dimana bangunan itu, tapi mereka bertanya kepada orang lain dan malahan sampai akan menggambarkan peta agar saya sampai disana. Karena saya merasa sudah tahu, saya pun berkata, "It's okay. I just need to go straight and then turn to the right, rite?". Dan pencarian tak berujung pun dilanjutkan.. Sampai akhirnya sampailah saya pada satu building, saya perkirakan bangunan itu adalah office karena banyak Westerners berpakain rapi berjalan sana sini menenteng tas kerja, saya beranikan diri masuk dan bertanya pada Uncle sang receptionist.

Nahh berkat dia, saya berhasil menemukan Beach Rd!! Tapi dimana The Plaza?? Di titik ini saya sudah hampir MENYERAH!! Dalam hati, "Ahhh sudah laa mau tukar tiket aja, jadi berangkatnya dari tempat yang saya kenal daripada ga ketemu gini". Tapi saya tetap meneruskan pencarian sampai ke satu hotel berbintang. Saya sungguh beruntung karena waktu itu ada bellboy yang keluar dan dia memberitahukan dimana letak The Plaza. "It's just behind this hotel, you can go from this hotel :)".

Bisa anda bayangkan saya meloncat kegirangan karena akhirnya menemukan The Plaza!!! hahaha!! :) :) :)

Walaupun pencarian nya melelahkan dan mengambil waktu cukup lama, saya dapat memetik pelajaran dari pengalaman ini. Sama dengan pencarian kerja yang sekarang saya lakukan, berputar dan berputar.. Nampak seperti tidak ada jalan keluar dari perjalanan ini. Tapi sekarang saya percaya dengan SEMANGAT dan TIDAK MUDAH PUTUS ASA dalam hati, kita pasti bisa menemukan akhir dari pencarian kita. Selain itu, dalam jalan-jalan yang kita lalui, kita patut bersyukur karena kita bisa bertemu dengan berbagai macam orang. Orang yang dengan senyum ramahnya dan apapun yang dia bisa lakukan untuk membantu kita, orang yang membantu kita dengan membuang muka, orang yang sama-sama mencari, dan orang yang sama sekali tidak tahu dimana tujuan kita. Kita belajar dan menambah nilai dalam hidup kita dari jalan-jalan yang kita lalui sebelum akhirnya kita meraih tempat tujuan.

So, it's very true what Uncle Ng told me via email:

"My  last word of advice.. take this transition period  gracefully. No doubt it is important and is in great urgency to get a job,  but  do be patience and enjoy the minutes of life since we can't change them anyway for  the time being."

Thank you, Uncle Ng and friends and people who have helped and supported me until this moment! May all of you be well and happy always! :) :) :)

A man with his friends

Ternyata menunggu itu bukanlah pekerjaan yang mudah untuk dilakukan.. Karena menunggu dan tidak mengerjakan sesuatu yang berarti, 2 malam yang lalu pikiran saya mulai terbang.. berpikiran yang tidak-tidak dan membayangkan masa depan yang belom tentu akan terjadi.

Well, akibatnya ketika bangun di pagi hari saya menjadi benar-benar DOWN!! Bingung dengan semua hal ini, dan merasa insecure. Fortunate enough, I have a lot of friends who support me. Mungkin di saat itu mereka tidak mengetahui kalau saya sedang DOWN, tapi apa yang mereka berikan kepada saya merupakan suatu hadiah yang sangat berarti. Hal yang mereka lakukan mampu mengubah mood saya 1000 degree dan menjadikan saya bersemangat kembali untuk tetap berjuang.

Nah, readers.. ini adalah pembuktian bahwa saya sebagai manusia, makhluk sosial, membutuhkan orang lain untuk dapat mengepakkan sayap lagi. Jadi hargailah dan cintailah orang-orang yang berada di sekitar anda, hapuskanlah rasa benci kepada mereka. Sungguhlah sayang jika hidup ini kita habiskan untuk membenci seseorang karena setitik kesalahan mereka. Belajar memaafkan dan dirimu akan hidup lebih berbahagia :) :)

May you be well and happy always!!! :)

Jangan tunggu untuk berbuat baek

Hello readers!! c:

Jangan bertanya kenapa saya jadi rajin nge-blog akhir-akhir ini hahaha!! Yakk seperti yang kalian semua ketahui, saya sedang mempunyai banyak sekali waktu luang, jadi saya pikir ada baiknya juga untuk dihabiskan menuliskan pengalaman saya yang mungkin bisa menginspirasikan teman-teman hehe!!

Pengalaman hari ini yang saya dapatkan adalah ketika saya naik MRT menuju Ang Mo Kio.

Karena kebosanan melanda, pukul 1.00 p.m saya langsung ketik di Google "Ang Mo Kio Shopping Centre". Nahh seperti yang diharapkan, keluarlah alamat web yang dituju beserta dengan bagaimana cara menuju ke sana. Di tengah perjalanan menuju Sembawang MRT, tiba-tiba saya teringat "OMB!! Saya belom kirim email ke Monash Admin yang menyatakan bahwa Jimmy hari ini akan mengambil academic transcript saya!!!" Secepat kilat saya pun sms Jimmy yang ternyata juga sedang berada di tempat pengambilan. Saya kembali lagi ke kamar dan mengirimkan email..

Satu rasa syukur di hati karena saya memiliki BEST FRIENDS! Bukan hanya Jimmy yang telah menolong saya, tetapi Hartanto juga bahkan sampai harus menelepon internasional ke no hp saya disini. Dan sungguh tidak beruntung pulsa di hp habis jadi kemaren Hartanto tidak bisa menelepon saya.. Terima kasih Jimmy dan Hartanto!! Oyaa Edi juga, karena telah memberi informasi =D

Okay, jadi setelah semua urusan beres.. saya kembali melanjutkan perjalanan menuju Ang Mo Kio Shopping Centre. Ketika sedang menunggu MRT datang, saya melihat seorang apek yang tangannya sakit (diikat kain yang tersambung ke leher atau apapun istilah kedokterannya haha). Disitu pun dalam hati, saya berkata "wah kasian ya apek ini.. Nanti di dalam MRT harus hati-hati. Kalau tersenggol mungkin lukanya ga sembuh-sembuh tuh".

Singkat cerita.. MRT datang ~ dan betapa kagetnya saya.. PENUH!!! Padahal ini kan bukan jam orang pulang kerja (masih jam 1.30 p.m.). Jadi kita semua masuk berjejalan ke dalam MRT. Berhenti di 1 station ahead, beberapa orang turun dan naek. Ada kursi yang bertuliskan RESERVED SEAT kosong, ehh malahan anak muda yang duduk disana, bukannya memberikan pada orang tua laennya yang sedang berdiri. Disini nih hati saya sudah galau, USIR ato GA, USIR ato GA?? Sampe berkali-kali pertanyaan seperti itu muncul di pikiran. Akhirnya di 1 station berikutnya, karena benar-benar merasa kasian dengan apek yang tangannya sakit itu, saya memberanikan diri ngomong ke anak muda yang duduk di RESERVED SEAT.

"Excuse me.. Do you mind to give your seat to this uncle?"

Trus kupanggil apek itu, dan akhirnya dia mendapatkan tempat duduk =D. Apek berkata "Xiexie".

Ada satu rasa bangga dan bahagia ketika bisa berbuat baik untuk orang lain. Tapi teman-teman, yang perlu dipetik hikmahnya disini itu bukanlah karena kita menolong orang lalu kita merasa bangga dan hebat. Bagi diri saya sendiri, pelajaran yang bisa diambil adalah JANGAN MENUNGGU UNTUK BERBUAT BAIK.
Dan saya bahagia karena saya dapat melakukan hal kecil ini, karena saya percaya jika saya tidak melakukannya.. pikiran bersalah akan menghantui saya.

Cheers,
Carol

Berikan SENYUM mu :)

Hello, readers!! c:

Hari ini saya ingin menceritakan pengalaman yang saya dapatkan kemarin :). Ini adalah pengalaman yang menghangatkan jiwa karena ternyata orang yang tidak kita kenal sekalipun dapat berbuat baik kepada kita...

Kemarin siang tiba-tiba saya mendapatkan phone call untuk pergi interview di daerah yang saya sama sekali tidak kenal. Pukul 3 p.m. saya berangkat dari rumah, dan perjalanan hampir 1 jam saya tempuh untuk mencapai MRT station terdekat (menurut prediksi dari internet). Pukul 4.30 p.m. adalah waktu yang telah ditetapkan untuk interview, jadi saya hanya memiliki sekitar 20 menit untuk bisa tiba di perusahaan tepat waktu. Benar-benar mencekam hati!! Setelah tiba di MRT station, saya mencari bus yang menurut prediksi dari internet (lagi!!) bisa mengantar saya sampai tempat tujuan. Jangan tanya bagaimana saya harus berputar kiri dan kanan untuk menemukan bus stop yang cocok. Putar kiri ternyata bus yang saya butuhkan tidak berhenti disana, putar kanan ternyata route bus yang saya butuhkan sudah bukan ke tempat yang dituju..

Di tengah kegalauan hati, hanya satu yang bisa saya pikirkan.. Segera ambil taxi! Tapi saya benar-benar tidak tahu dimana taxi stop hahaha!! Sampai akhirnya saya putuskan untuk menyeberang jalan dan sungguh beruntung saya karena akhirnya bisa menemukan taxi stop. Kali ini waktu sudah menunjukkan pukul 4.15 p.m. (waktu menurut jam tangan saya, yang kata teman-teman sebenarnya kelebihan 5 menit haha) dan tidak ada taxi sama sekali di taxi stop!!! Setelah beberapa menit menunggu, ada 1 taxi yang tulisan atasnya HIRED tapi ketika dipanggil menghampiri saya.. Saya cepat-cepat bertanya apakah uncle tahu alamat yang dimaksudkan, dan dia mengangguk. Wahh, langsung saya lompat ke dalam taxi dengan hati tidak tenang karena waktu hampir mencapai 4.30 p.m.

Di dalam taxi, si uncle mengajak berbicara dengan bahasa Mandarin.. Yahh seperti yang kalian tahu, Mandarin saya tidak sebegitu hebat jadi saya jawab tanpa peduli grammar Mandarin hancur hahaha! Dan si uncle pikir saya orang Malaysia.. Selama berbicara dengan uncle, attention saya agak sedikit teralih dari dag dig dug hampir telat haha!! Sesampainya di depan perusahaan, uncle masih berkata GOOD LUCK dengan senyumnya yang lebar :) :) :)

Nahh di sinilah saya merasakan bahwa kata-kata semangat dan SENYUM sangatlah bermanfaat walaupun itu datang dari seorang asing. Saya dengan percaya diri pun bisa memasuki ruang interview :), walaopun entah bagaimana hasil interview itu (tiba di ruang interview pukul 4.28 p.m.)... Jika berhasil sungguhlah berbahagia, jika tidak berhasil itu adalah suatu pengalaman berharga :)

Teman-teman, satu pelajaran yang bisa diambil disini adalah BERIKAN SENYUM mu walaupun mereka bukanlah orang yang kita kenal, karena kita tidak mengetahui apa dampak sebuah SENYUM pada hati mereka :)

Semoga bermanfaat!! May all beings be well and happy always :)

Bertindak Bijaksana

Hello semuanya!! Maaf lama tak meng-update blog hehe!!

Anyway, sekarang saya di Singapore dalam pencarian kerja haha!! Banyak hal yang sudah terjadi, dan satu hal yang ingin diceritakan disini adalah pengalaman saya mencari kerja :)

Bukanlah sesuatu yang mudah memang untuk mencari kerja, apalagi buat kita-kita yang baru saja lulus dari university. Kita menuntut diri kita untuk cepat mendapatkan kerja, menuntut diri kita untuk tidak kalah saing dengan orang lain yang sama-sama baru lulus dalam mendapatkan kerja, dan masih banyak tuntutan lainnya. Namun tahukah kita bahwa sebenarnya tuntutan-tuntutan itu diri kita sendirilah yang membuat dan akhirnya meledakkan emosi kita?
Saya sendiri pun tak bisa memungkiri kalau dalam beberapa minggu yang lalu, saya adalah manusia yang penuh dengan tekanan, bingung, dan hanya berpikir untuk *DAPATKAN KERJAAN SESEGERA MUNGKIN*!! hahaha. Sampai saya melakukan hal-hal yang mungkin tidak bisa diterima secara logis haha.


Bisa dibilang saya cukup beruntung karena saya kembali ditemukan pada ajaran Buddha yang menyadarkan saya akan semua ini. Terimakasih kepada teman-teman yang sudah berkontribusi banyak dalam penyadaran ini haha!! Kepada Mr. Ng yang hanya pernah ketemu dengan saya sekali, tapi benar-benar mengajarkan banyak wisdom kepada saya lewat email-emailnya. Tak lupa juga buat Rifin dan Ko Ju yang menyadarkan saya dari nasehat-nasehatnya. Juga Lia dan Jimmy karena sudah menemani saya jalan-jalan dan meng-explore Singapore selama beberapa hari ini.

Saya kembali sadar bahwa disinilah apa yang dikatakan Sang Buddha adalah benar "The Middle Way", "This moment is the reality". Karena selama ini saya stress menekan diri untuk cepat dapat kerjaan padahal tak banyak yang bisa saya lakukan selain mengirim resume rajin-rajin dan menanti telepon untuk interview. Selama ini pula saya berpikiran ke depan, bagaimana kalau sampai tidak diterima kerja di Singapore padahal sudah habisin uang ortu tinggal di Singapore gini? Nahh, sebenarnya semua itu hanyalah ilusi dari pikiran. Apakah memang benar ortu merasa tidak bahagia karena saya berada di Singapore? Itu suatu hal yang tidak benar karena jika diingat ortu sangat mendukung ketika saya tiba-tiba kembali bersemangat buat mencari kerja di luar Indonesia setelah tidak mendapatkan visa di Malaysia. Mereka bisa dikatakan langsung  menyiapkan apa yang bisa mereka persiapkan agar saya bisa hidup dan mencari kerja di Singapore. Satu hal yang ingin ditegaskan disini adalah ortu hanya berharap kebahagiaan kepada anak-anaknya, dan kita sebagai anak jangan malahan membuat diri kita sendiri tidak bahagia karena pikiran-pikiran jelek kita.

Bertindak bijaksana adalah suatu hal yang perlu dilakukan dalam masa-masa seperti ini. Janganlah menjadi stress karena dikelabuhi oleh pikiran sendiri. Tenangkan pikiran dan mulai melihat segala sesuatu sesuai kenyataan. Dalam waktu penantian ini, kenapa tidak kita menikmati apa yang ada? Mungkin nanti setelah kerja, kita ga bakal bisa jalan santai-santai dan tertawa hahaha hihihi dengan teman dan keluarga.


Cheers,
Carol
P.S. Thanks buat Nicky, anjing owner, yang selalu menemani dan kuajak ngomong hahaha!! Btw, anjing bole dikasih makan roti ga sih? Setiap kali saya beli roti healthy oatmeal, dia minta terus.. jadi kukasih 1/4 hahaha!

Sahabat

I don't know where I get this ability, yet I am happy to have and share it.

A poem for

"SAHABAT"

Akhirnya kita sampai di penghujung kebersamaan kita di Malaysia.
Selama 4 tahun disini, kita telah tertawa bahkan menangis bersama.
Cobalah kita ingat kembali, perjalanan kita selama 4 tahun di Sunway, Malaysia...

Saat pertama kali sampai disini, kita bukanlah siapa-siapa,
tanpa teman,
merasa takut dan khawatir,
bahkan bertanya pada diri sendiri,
"Akankah aku memiliki seorang sahabat disini?"

Namun, seiring berjalannya waktu, kita menemukan arti sahabat dalam diri orang-orang yang hadir disini maupun mereka yang berada jauh dari kita sekarang.
Ada kalanya kita merasa malas, jengkel, kesal, dan marah pada mereka.
Ada kalanya pula kita merasa mereka tidak lagi peduli pada kita.
Tapi, dalam hati kita yang paling kecil, kita mengerti bahwa sesungguhnya mereka adalah orang-orang paling berarti dalam hidup kita.

Mereka mengajarkan kita untuk menjadi seorang pribadi yang sabar, toleran, penuh kasih, dan masih banyak lagi perihal kehidupan yang telah kita dapatkan.
Kita telah mengarungi suka dan duka bersama-sama.

Marilah di moment ini, kita merefleksikan kembali pada apa yang telah terjadi selama 4 tahun masa university kita di Sunway, Malaysia.
Mulai dari pesta ulang tahun, dinner bersama, bbQ, karaoke, jalan-jalan bareng, belajar, tidur bersama, dan masih banyak hal lagi.

Katakan di dalam hatimu masing-masing:

"Maafkanlah diriku, wahai sahabat, jika aku telah menyakitimu. Aku sayang padamu! Dan terima kasih atas persahabatan indah ini. Sukses selalu bagimu, sahabat-sahabatku."

written by Carolina Lestari
played during the farewell night on 1st July 2010
with the background music: Only time (enya) and Kiss the rain (unknown)
Thank You FAMILY :) :)

Life moves on

Finally I finished my exam :)

Well, the time is moving fast

Now it is the time for the oldies to return to their home, and the new flowers to arise

And separation is happening

With happiness, let us face it

Life moves on ~

P.S. For Andy in Toy Story 3: "You have done such a great thing, to let go of Woody and friends for someone else and let them to be happy with their new family."

Thanks, Toy Story 3 :)

Understanding Life

Tomorrow will be my second exam, and here I am..

I think these days I have been too hard to myself
I forced myself to study and study for SCI3716 so that I will not feel sad or disappoint like what I felt for GEN3030.

but my body rejected me this late afternoon,
I got a bad headache and could not continue studying.

Well, it is a good thing, isn't it? hahaha!! :)
I can spend my time chatting with my sister and browse nice thing
This is one of the nicest thing I get:

LIFE IS TOO IRONIC TO BE FULLY UNDERSTOOD

It takes sadness to know what happiness is.

Noise to appreciate silence.

And absence to value presence.

Thanks to mom as well for reminding me that life is easy, just me who makes it hard :)

Love you, mom! :)

Come and Go

I have changed my layout again :)

This time I feel that this color suits me!

There is one good sentence for me today:

"Do not dwell in the past or lose yourself in the future, for the past no longer exists and the future is not yet here"

I feel good every time I read the sentence during this kind of feeling. It reminds me to be mindful of this moment. Happy, sadness, expected, unexpected results are part of life and instead of seeing them as our objects, let us see them as a process of life. 

Come and go ~

Expectation

Until today I had expected too much when I did something good to her.
Hoping that she would be nice to me

bla

bla

bla

I come to my realization that Buddha's words were true. "We always get something that we do not want, and this is one of suffering".

In case of eradicating the suffering, I am purifying my mind by being in this present moment.

Expectation is only illusion that is created by the mind.

Exam Confession

Here I would like to confess that during this period of exam preparation:

1. I read "Five people you meet in heaven" in ONE DAY instead of memorizing GEN3030. The book is awesome!!!
2. I slept in Shinta's house instead of staying at home and memorizing GEN3030
3. I studied in J.Co for my first time
4. I watched three movies "Letter to Juliet" , "Prince of Persia", and "Killers" instead of studying
5. I played facebook
6. I wrote down notes in microsoft office and erased it again, and re-did the same things to memorize GEN3030
7. I studied in Taylor Lake Side's library for 8 hours!
8. I went to SJBA temple and shared my experiences as a foreigner student
9. I met new friendsssssss from KTT :) :)
10. Hurray!!! I went to Starbucks, drank hot green tea, ate blueberry + chocolate cake without paying anything kakakakaka!!! ;p

Despite of some of bad things above (hehehe), at the bottom of my heart, I promise myself to study hard for the last exam of my undergraduate study. Jia you!!

Study and play smart ;)
Good luck to ME and FRIENDS!! All of us can do it well :)

P.S. I never regret doing those things hehehe!! because they were awesome things to do :). The next thing I need to do is increasing my motivation to study. C'mon C'mon ;)

Reflection

Tia: Aduh, Din.... Gigi gua sakit amat ya..
Dina: Udah ke dokter gigi aja, biar diobatin
Tia: Din, dari kecil sampai gede, gua tuh paling takut ama dokter gigi. Ngelihat bornya aja gua udah ngeri, belum lagi jarum suntiknya. Mana biayanya mahal lagi
Dina: Ya udah, mau nga berobat yang murah terus loe nggak usah ngelihat bor dan jarum suntik?
Tia: Mauuu...
Dina: Ama gua aja deh, ntar gua cabut gigi loe yang sakit ama tang.
Tia: Dinaaaaaaaa....loe tu ye...., aduhhh gigi gua.....

Kita sering meremehkan hal-hal kecil yang ada di kehidupan kita. Gigi telah banyak membantu di dalam kelangsungan hidup kita untuk mengunyah makanan. Kadang kala kita melupakan jasa mereka. Kadang kita lupa menggosok gigi kita dan lupa merawat mereka. Jika tiba-tiba gigi kita sakit, apa yang kita lakukan? Kita mengeluh atas penderitaan kita, mengumpat karena rasa sakit yang ditimbulkan oleh gigi kita. Pernahkah kita mencari tahu apa penyebab dari sakit gigi yang sedang dialami oleh kita? Ingat, segala sesuatu yang timbul di dalam kehidupan kita pasti ada penyebabnya.

Demikian juga dengan kehidupan kita sehari-hari. Kadang kala kita mengeluh atas peristiwa buruk yang menimpa diri kita. Yang lebih parah lagi jika kita mengalami peristiwa yang menggembirakan, kita menjadi lupa daratan. Kita lupa mensyukuri hal-hal baik yang terjadi di dalam kehidupan kita. Inikah gaya hidup manusia zaman sekarang?

Ambilah sebuah contoh simple yang sering dialami ketika kita menganggur, kita menginginkan mempunyai pekerjaan. Suatu hari, kita mendapatkan pekerjaan yang baru, kita merasa gembira luar biasa. Setelah beberapa kita bekerja, kita mulai mengeluh mengenai pekerjaan kita tersebut, mulai dari pekerjaannya susah, gajinya kecil, tidak mendapat uang lembur sampai ke hal-hal kecil lainnya seperti bosnya pendek, kecil, gemuk, cerewet, eh udah gitu hidup lagi.

Padahal kalau kita mau mengkoreksi diri kita, belum tentu hal-hal buruk yang menimpa pada waktu kita bekerja merupakan kesalahan orang lain. Bisa saja diri kita yang lambat di dalam bekerja sehingga bos kita menjadi marah ketika kita tidak bisa menyelesaikan pekerjaan tersebut pada waktunya. Kalau saja kita mau belajar sesuatu hal yang baru, lama kelamaan kita pasti menguasainya. Setiap orang pasti menginginkan gaji yang besar, akan tetapi bukankah lebih baik kita mempunyai penghasilan daripada tidak sama sekali? Siapa tahu jika kita rajin bekerja, kita mendapatkan kenaikan dalam gaji? Andai kata, kenaikan gaji tersebut tidaklah banyak, hitung-hitung kita membeli pengalaman sehingga ketika sudah waktunya pindah kerja ataupun membuka usaha sendiri kita sudah mempunyai bekal pengalaman yang cukup.

Hidup ini bagaikan sebuah kaca yang mencerminkan siapa diri kita sesungguhnya. Hidup ini juga merupakan sebuah misteri, apapun yang terjadi di masa depan, tidak ada satupun yang mengetahuinya dengan pasti. Jika kita bisa pasrah dan menerima apapun yang terjadi di dalam kehidupan kita dengan lapang dada maka kita dapat menjalani kehidupan ini dengan lebih ringan.

Semoga bermanfaat :)

Think less and be happy more

I just opened a blog that has shot me right into my heart hehe!

It says "Think less and you will be happy, Think more and you will be unhappy".

It is very very very correct!! Because when you think more, think of why this thing can happen, think of how difficult this thing is, and think and think again and again, you will make your life to be difficult.

Everything is, indeed, simple.

It is like what one of the greatest man in this world told us, "There are a lot leaves in the wood, but we only can take and care leaves in our hand." Be in this present moment, watch your breath, and tadaaaa you will find the answer.

May you be well and happy always :) :) :)

Dot Dot Dot

Am I falling in ****????

L.O.V.E.

I guess this time is the time for L.O.V.E. in the chemistry between man and woman.

Romeo and Juliet

Everyone including me is saying and discussing about it. To love or not to love.

Do you know what is the meaning of L.O.V.E.?

If you please me to answer, I will say that L.O.V.E is a feeling, but it can't be touched, seen, and smelt by the outer senses. Only by the heart, it can be felt. And only by the heart, you can find the answer of its calling correctly.

Unnoticeably, L.O.V.E. has shaped me to be I am now. The joyful, aspiration, effort, sadness, left-out, and many more mixture of feelings have came to me and I am glad enough today I still survive and move on :)

It is hard when someone whom you loved, ask you not to love him/her. It is hard too when someone you loved, suddenly move out from your life. But... Life is more than that ~ ~ ~

When they asked you to leave, take a step back and reflect. When they suddenly move out, accept the fact, recall things he has left for you, and learn to be a better person from the experience.

When things happen not as I expected it to be, I always say to myself that I am a strong girl and big enough to face this problem. I will not give up, because nothing in this world is impossible when you think it is possible. Again, everything in this world shall pass, whether it is good or bad things.

L.O.V.E., in fact, is all about acceptance and letting go. Acceptance because you need to accept your partner as they are, not changing them to be someone whom you like him/her to be. Letting go because unexpected things always come, for example .."death" .. to be extreme.

For this moment, I have felt my heart with love from friends and family. Honestly, I found one that I thought to be "it", yet I have prepared and told myself not to put high expectation. Nevertheless, I am going to be happy if my loved one found happiness outside myself :). Not stupid this time. Because the best for now is just going with the flow :)

'TaraBuddY

I shall tell you the story of a heroine from 'TaraBuddY...

Once upon a time, there were 6 warriors from Indonesia who bravely opened up the opportunity for Indonesian Buddhist Youth in Malaysia to learn more about the teaching of the Buddha as well as to find their true friends. The tremendous support from Subang Jaya Buddhist Association - Youth Section is one of the factor contributed in the idea of building 'TaraBuddY.

In fact, the name of 'TaraBuddY was invented by V. H. - a very creative girl from SJBA-YS. The name is combination of Nusantara, Buddies, and Youth.

This is the story of one of the warrior named Cles3 who had never dreamed to have such opportunity. Before she involved in 'TaraBuddY, she was a shy (maybe a bit nerd), perfectionist, egoistic, and low self-confidence girl. One thing that has been good in her is her heart. She always look and give her best for those people who, in her opinion, need helps. But all of her helps were done without any wisdom, so sometimes after she did good things she would feel regret of doing it.

On one fine day, she was informed and invited to be one of the warrior to build 'TaraBuddY. She was not too sure at first, but due to her interest in trying something new, she finally accepted it. The first journey was tough, very tough! Meetings were the dessert for almost every night, only to discuss about what they should gave to friends who would come to the session. And this thing happened for one semester, before the number of other brave warriors were added in. 

Throughout the journey of 'TaraBuddY, Cles3 had found disappointment, sadness, happiness, wonderful people, great experiences, and many precious gems. In fact, 'TaraBuddY has made her being who she is here and now. A president of Monash Buddhist Society, contributor for a motivational blog, good time-manager for her own time, person who thinks optimistically, sister to younger brothers and sisters, friend, lover (to family and in the progress to cockroach), brave, kind girl with a little more wisdom on her side. She even has better relationships with her parents and family. She increases her lessons of life from what she has learned in 'TaraBuddY.

Now that she is in the end of her time in 'TaraBuddY, she wants to thank all of those wonderful people who had worked together with her both in happy and storm time. She was deeply touched with what she had been given in the last session of 'TaraBuddY for this semester. She said it was a little shocking session, simple, yet bringing deep meaning to her heart. Old and new friends are by her side, and even some people asked her not to forget about them in the future.

I guess Cles3 had a real GREAT time in 'TaraBuddY. She learns a lot about the teaching of the Buddha and applies them in her life. She even finds those people who are true friends "Kalayana mitras" for her. 'TaraBuddY has made her life to be colorful as it appears today.

Lesson from laptop

These two days I had problem with my laptop, especially the adaptor part.

I found it difficult to live without my laptop, because I need it to do my assignment and keep myself update with latest informations. Not to give up, yesterday I went to Pyramid to get a new adaptor or maybe if it was possible repairing the old one.

At the end of the day, I got a new adaptor, and I was so happy.. I used my laptop for the whole night!

However, this morning when I would like to continue my assignment...

my laptop did not want to work.. And the problem was with the adaptor again! I was speechless and down. Afraid of can't finish my work, afraid of disappoint my friends, afraid of this and that. 

Honestly, I never felt that kind of fear before..

So, this night I forced myself to go to Pyramid again and changed the broken adaptor.

Although I am SUPER tired now, I am glad that I experienced this, because it teaches me that we need to love and take care whatever or whoever we have now, because we never know when the time they will go. Forgive for any mistakes that they have made, and start to live meaningfully in every moment.

Remember that everything in this world is impermanence.

May myself be well and happy always!

May all beings be well and happy always!

With Metta,

The "want" List

Okay.. after days and days doing assignments, thinking, and taking care of the societies.. I would like to announce that myself has been tired of these things. And I wish that my "want" lists can be granted (HAHAHA).

The "want" lists:

1. I want to watch IPMAN 2!!!

2. I want to eat Baskin Robin

3. I want to buy face and eye mask, then enjoy my time wearing them

4. I want to finish reading "Time Traveler's Wife"

5. I want to take holiday, away from Malaysian home and some people that have made me to think (this is impossible for sure, pergi kemanapun pasti akan ada orang yang membuatmu berpikir)

STOP!

Let me end up the "want" lists to number five for NOW hehehe!!

Haiyooo.. My desire to watch IPMAN 2 is soooo high should be reduced for the sake of my assignments!!!

Receiving

I find this phrase is working on me

"To let go is actually to receive"

by Master Sheng Yen

Indeed it is a reality in this world. By grasping something for too long, you will forget that actually it hurts you.

The same goes for me...

I was being hard to myself to let go what I have here;

friends, societies, Kalayana mitras, experiences, and many things.

I shall begin to release my grasping.

Although it looks difficult to me,

but

I shall do it for the truth that something bigger is waiting for me in other place.

After all, "life is a gamble" as a close friend has told me before.

Meanwhile... Today is a very special day

Happy Mother's Day!!!

to all Mommies in this world,

and especially to my beloved mom =)

LOVE you forever!

Mom, without you, I am not the one I am today.

Thank you for the lessons of life

you have taught me.

May you be well and happy always =)

May all mommies in this world be well and happy always!

May all beings be well and happy always!

With Love,

One Step at A Time

This is my last semester in university

and I feel great to myself

because this semester I have done so much things

which send me to be closer to everyone.

I am truly enjoying my part as

a big sister to everyone.

However, there are times

I act like a "mei mei" to someone :)

and, honestly, I enjoy that too.

Living and enjoying things step by step

are really great.

It is a simple way yet bringing a BIG impact in my life.

One step at a time

Where is the HAPPINESS?

Hello!!!
For your NEWS, I have made one new blog with two friends - Kalayana mitras. We hope by making this blog, readers are able to open their hearts and minds, thus seeing and understanding things as they are.


Today I started my first post in that blog. Below is the story which I took from Secangkirteh [dot] com.


Where is the HAPPINESS?

Seorang petani dan istrinya bergandengan tangan menyusuri jln sepulang dari sawah sambil diguyur air hujan,lewatlah sepeda motor di depan mereka, berkatalah petani ini pd istrinya "lihatlah bu,betapa bahagianya suami istri yg naik sepeda motor itu,meskipun mereka juga kehujanan, tapi mereka bisa cepat sampai dirumah, tdk seperti kita yg hrs lelah berjalan utk sampai kerumah".


Sementara itu pengendara sepeda motor dan istrinya yg sedang berboncengan di bawah derasnya air hujan melihat mobil pick up lewat didepan mereka, pengendara sepeda motor itu berkata kpd istrinya "lihat bu, betapa bahagianya orang yg naik mobil itu, mereka tdk perlu kehujanan seperti kita".


Di dlm mobil pick up yg dikendarai sepasang suami istri terjadi perbincangan ketika mobil sedan Mercy lewat dihadapan mereka "lihatlah bu, betapa bahagia orang yg naik mobil bagus itu, mobil itu pasti nyaman di kendarai,tdk seperti mobil kita yg sering mogok".

Pengendara mobil Mercy itu seorang Pria kaya, dan ketika dia melihat sepasang suami istri yg berjalan bergandengan tangan di bawah guyuran air hujan, pria kaya itu berkata dlm hatinya "betapa bahagianya suami istri itu, mereka dgn mesranya berjalan bergandengan tangan sambil menyusuri indahnya jalan di pedesaan ini, sementara aku dan istriku tdk pernah punya waktu utk berdua karena kesibukan kami masing masing".

Kebahagiaan tidak akan pernah kau miliki jika kau hanya melihat kebahagiaan milik orang lain,dan selalu membandingkan hidupmu dgn hidup orang lain. Bersyukurlah atas apa yang ada dalam hidupmu, karena di situlah letak kebahagiaan sejati.

I love the story so much!! We, as human beings, for a lot of times have compared ourselves to others, feeling as a loser (even when we have not start to try it), and regretting what we had done in the past. Why do not we accept ourselves? And instead of complaining, let us make this opportunity to be thankful and grateful with what we have :) :) :)

Butterfly

This afternoon while I was walking to go home, I found a beautiful light brown butterfly flew near to me. The butterfly did not fly away, instead it flew near to my leg.

When I saw it, the thought appeared in my mind was "Maybe this butterfly was Pakpak A Si who passed away last Sunday. Maybe he wanted to say goodbye and tell me that he is happy!"

I am glad and believe that Pakpak A Si is well and happy :). Now, he is free from all of the physical suffering that he had during his life, "diabetes". 

May he be well and happy always! May my big family be strong, well, and happy always!

Thank you to Ms. Ng, Ming Han, and friends that had helped me to perform dana and transfer it to my uncle =).

Thank you to Bhantes in SJBA temple who lead us in the sharing of merits.

Thank you to everyone for the supports.


Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu

Mr. Ant

I was so emo this afternoon. And when I examined it...

Was it because of the weather?
Was it because of the food I took today?

The answer was NOPE! It was because of my mind. I kept thinking of impossibility and those negative thoughts had let me down :(. And the worst thing was although I knew it was because of my mind, I still could not control it.

Until a big ant suddenly bit my skin while I was taking a shower. The pain brought me back to this reality of HERE and NOW. All of the thoughts were no longer present, just fast as the disappearance of the waves in ocean ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I am not angry to the ant, but thankful to him for waking me up from my illusion =).

Lucky enough I did not kill the ant, because at that time I spontaneously swept my skin. The ant fell down at the corner of the bathroom, yet still moving and running :)

WHY

WHY is the word that is recently hanging inside my head. I asked myself why do I need to do this? why do I want to do this? why am I here? why...

I, indeed, spent hours to think of the answers of a special "why" question. And I found that these answers suited me.

• I love to take care of others. I am enjoying my part as being a big sister to everyone.
• I prefer to spend my time by doing something useful than spend it by shopping. Sometimes tiredness because of shopping can make me to be really sick.
• I learn life lessons throughout this journey and very much like to share the lessons with others.

However, those reasons can be broken up when I am really tired and there are inducements not to do it anymore.

...................................................................................................................................................................

CAUTION:
The above thing is only the game of mind. It is impermanent. Everything in this world, indeed, is impermanent. Thus, I shall not dwell in those thoughts for any longer time. I shall train my mind to see things as they truly are by being in this present moment =)

Big Days

Hello everyone!!!

Hihihi finally I can update my blog!! I was really super busy these days.

To finish the story of "Pawprints on My Heart".. let see the pictures below.. They speak a lot..

Friends from Chicken d'GondelZ helped me during charity time. Heart you, guys! =)

Sis. Kah Yein visited us in the booth

Monash Buddhist Society's team with members

After the charity, the team under Monash Buddhist Society invited Uncle Vijaya to give Dhamma Talk in our campus. The chance of having uncle as our speaker is really rare, and we had it! =). Glad that the crowd was unexpected, and those people were enthusiastic listening to the talk. A big Thank You to Uncle Vijaya, who at that time had sore throat, but still explained Buddhism to us clearly. Another big Thank You to Monash Buddhist Society's team, they did good job although it was the first time for them to manage such activity.

Superman or Lotus?

The Dhamma Talk was given on Thursday at 5 pm - 7 pm. And on Friday, I needed to submit my essay (10%) which was luckily I could done it on time.

Another big event for me was BUKIT CAHAYA's TRIP!!! The trip was being held on last Saturday. Apart from my tiredness, I had a real fun and great time on the trip. The team for this trip is really SUPER TEAM!! I adore them! Although we didn't know each other so well at first, but by working together and spending our valuable time to discuss activities, food, money, and logistics.. We are united =).

For me, it was a real pleasure to have them as my team.

And the story of me and the team didn't finish after the trip had been done. We are closer now. We laugh and respect each one of us more than before. Some pictures from the site visit of Bukit Cahaya until the trip itself.

Site visit with Stanley, Adeline, Yenny, Hartono, and Linda

Winner of the day. Although the members of the group was only 5, they could win the station hunt. Congratz guys! =)

Besides my friends in organizations, I am glad to announce that I still have wonderful friends outside. They are special, because they are not friends who always nag you to do something together. They help me a lot and I learn much lessons from them as well.

Yesterday, I spent my whole day with some of them; Farid, Vina, Edi, and Leo. We had a journey to Malacca which was a great time experience. These are some photos of the outing...

Ice kacang

Farid and Leo. They looked very happy, isn't it? 

Farid and Edi returned to their child age

Five warriors from KL to Malacca. From left to right, Edi, Vina, Leo, Carol, and Farid