L.O.V.E.

I guess this time is the time for L.O.V.E. in the chemistry between man and woman.

Romeo and Juliet

Everyone including me is saying and discussing about it. To love or not to love.

Do you know what is the meaning of L.O.V.E.?

If you please me to answer, I will say that L.O.V.E is a feeling, but it can't be touched, seen, and smelt by the outer senses. Only by the heart, it can be felt. And only by the heart, you can find the answer of its calling correctly.

Unnoticeably, L.O.V.E. has shaped me to be I am now. The joyful, aspiration, effort, sadness, left-out, and many more mixture of feelings have came to me and I am glad enough today I still survive and move on :)

It is hard when someone whom you loved, ask you not to love him/her. It is hard too when someone you loved, suddenly move out from your life. But... Life is more than that ~ ~ ~

When they asked you to leave, take a step back and reflect. When they suddenly move out, accept the fact, recall things he has left for you, and learn to be a better person from the experience.

When things happen not as I expected it to be, I always say to myself that I am a strong girl and big enough to face this problem. I will not give up, because nothing in this world is impossible when you think it is possible. Again, everything in this world shall pass, whether it is good or bad things.

L.O.V.E., in fact, is all about acceptance and letting go. Acceptance because you need to accept your partner as they are, not changing them to be someone whom you like him/her to be. Letting go because unexpected things always come, for example .."death" .. to be extreme.

For this moment, I have felt my heart with love from friends and family. Honestly, I found one that I thought to be "it", yet I have prepared and told myself not to put high expectation. Nevertheless, I am going to be happy if my loved one found happiness outside myself :). Not stupid this time. Because the best for now is just going with the flow :)

'TaraBuddY

I shall tell you the story of a heroine from 'TaraBuddY...

Once upon a time, there were 6 warriors from Indonesia who bravely opened up the opportunity for Indonesian Buddhist Youth in Malaysia to learn more about the teaching of the Buddha as well as to find their true friends. The tremendous support from Subang Jaya Buddhist Association - Youth Section is one of the factor contributed in the idea of building 'TaraBuddY.

In fact, the name of 'TaraBuddY was invented by V. H. - a very creative girl from SJBA-YS. The name is combination of Nusantara, Buddies, and Youth.

This is the story of one of the warrior named Cles3 who had never dreamed to have such opportunity. Before she involved in 'TaraBuddY, she was a shy (maybe a bit nerd), perfectionist, egoistic, and low self-confidence girl. One thing that has been good in her is her heart. She always look and give her best for those people who, in her opinion, need helps. But all of her helps were done without any wisdom, so sometimes after she did good things she would feel regret of doing it.

On one fine day, she was informed and invited to be one of the warrior to build 'TaraBuddY. She was not too sure at first, but due to her interest in trying something new, she finally accepted it. The first journey was tough, very tough! Meetings were the dessert for almost every night, only to discuss about what they should gave to friends who would come to the session. And this thing happened for one semester, before the number of other brave warriors were added in. 

Throughout the journey of 'TaraBuddY, Cles3 had found disappointment, sadness, happiness, wonderful people, great experiences, and many precious gems. In fact, 'TaraBuddY has made her being who she is here and now. A president of Monash Buddhist Society, contributor for a motivational blog, good time-manager for her own time, person who thinks optimistically, sister to younger brothers and sisters, friend, lover (to family and in the progress to cockroach), brave, kind girl with a little more wisdom on her side. She even has better relationships with her parents and family. She increases her lessons of life from what she has learned in 'TaraBuddY.

Now that she is in the end of her time in 'TaraBuddY, she wants to thank all of those wonderful people who had worked together with her both in happy and storm time. She was deeply touched with what she had been given in the last session of 'TaraBuddY for this semester. She said it was a little shocking session, simple, yet bringing deep meaning to her heart. Old and new friends are by her side, and even some people asked her not to forget about them in the future.

I guess Cles3 had a real GREAT time in 'TaraBuddY. She learns a lot about the teaching of the Buddha and applies them in her life. She even finds those people who are true friends "Kalayana mitras" for her. 'TaraBuddY has made her life to be colorful as it appears today.

Lesson from laptop

These two days I had problem with my laptop, especially the adaptor part.

I found it difficult to live without my laptop, because I need it to do my assignment and keep myself update with latest informations. Not to give up, yesterday I went to Pyramid to get a new adaptor or maybe if it was possible repairing the old one.

At the end of the day, I got a new adaptor, and I was so happy.. I used my laptop for the whole night!

However, this morning when I would like to continue my assignment...

my laptop did not want to work.. And the problem was with the adaptor again! I was speechless and down. Afraid of can't finish my work, afraid of disappoint my friends, afraid of this and that. 

Honestly, I never felt that kind of fear before..

So, this night I forced myself to go to Pyramid again and changed the broken adaptor.

Although I am SUPER tired now, I am glad that I experienced this, because it teaches me that we need to love and take care whatever or whoever we have now, because we never know when the time they will go. Forgive for any mistakes that they have made, and start to live meaningfully in every moment.

Remember that everything in this world is impermanence.

May myself be well and happy always!

May all beings be well and happy always!

With Metta,

The "want" List

Okay.. after days and days doing assignments, thinking, and taking care of the societies.. I would like to announce that myself has been tired of these things. And I wish that my "want" lists can be granted (HAHAHA).

The "want" lists:

1. I want to watch IPMAN 2!!!

2. I want to eat Baskin Robin

3. I want to buy face and eye mask, then enjoy my time wearing them

4. I want to finish reading "Time Traveler's Wife"

5. I want to take holiday, away from Malaysian home and some people that have made me to think (this is impossible for sure, pergi kemanapun pasti akan ada orang yang membuatmu berpikir)

STOP!

Let me end up the "want" lists to number five for NOW hehehe!!

Haiyooo.. My desire to watch IPMAN 2 is soooo high should be reduced for the sake of my assignments!!!

Receiving

I find this phrase is working on me

"To let go is actually to receive"

by Master Sheng Yen

Indeed it is a reality in this world. By grasping something for too long, you will forget that actually it hurts you.

The same goes for me...

I was being hard to myself to let go what I have here;

friends, societies, Kalayana mitras, experiences, and many things.

I shall begin to release my grasping.

Although it looks difficult to me,

but

I shall do it for the truth that something bigger is waiting for me in other place.

After all, "life is a gamble" as a close friend has told me before.

Meanwhile... Today is a very special day

Happy Mother's Day!!!

to all Mommies in this world,

and especially to my beloved mom =)

LOVE you forever!

Mom, without you, I am not the one I am today.

Thank you for the lessons of life

you have taught me.

May you be well and happy always =)

May all mommies in this world be well and happy always!

May all beings be well and happy always!

With Love,

One Step at A Time

This is my last semester in university

and I feel great to myself

because this semester I have done so much things

which send me to be closer to everyone.

I am truly enjoying my part as

a big sister to everyone.

However, there are times

I act like a "mei mei" to someone :)

and, honestly, I enjoy that too.

Living and enjoying things step by step

are really great.

It is a simple way yet bringing a BIG impact in my life.

One step at a time